I can say that my life has revealed that encouragement beats criticism.
During formidable years of our lives whether beginning as children or beginning again post stroke, authentic encouragement has always been welcome and needed.
It has been hard throughout my life and unfortunately I encountered more people who are willing to voice their criticism than those who voice their encouragement.
This has taught me to choose to display my encouragement more than anything else.
Maybe the old expression "if you don't have anything good to say don't say anything at all" rang a little too strong in my life and sitting on our hands or biting our tongues isn't necessarily the thing to do either.
In hindsight things should be said at times rather than suppressing them, but if the things to be said are not good then getting the point out in a productive insightful fashion is still advisable.
Unfortunately I seem to see people suppress encouragement more than criticism...too bad, why can't it be the other way around? Is it the squeaky wheel gets the grease analogy? As my friend pointed out the squeaky wheel gets replaced...lets hope it does.
A Dalai Lama once said, At the best we should help others. At the least, we should not harm them.
This said, encouragement helps all of us, whether recovering or just living.
Encouragement reinforces us, it helps us continue. If this blog helps anyone let me know, for now I am running out of things to post.
I continue to hope for full recovery...after eight years post stroke, I might resign myself to where I am at that point but for now, I near the three year mark and I maintain the hope that I can come back all the way!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Discoloured and swelling
My ankles seem to swell and get discoloured over the last three years especially after being on my feet for a long time and walking for a long time.
When I was in the hospital the swelling in my ankles had the staff put nylons on my legs. What a pretty sight! NOT!
I don't wear nylons anymore nor do I want to!
I do notice that the swelling and red blood like freckles appear sometimes under the socks/short socks I wear with my jogging shoes. I think it has something to do with the medicines, time on my feet and even the socks since there is a definitive line where my short socks end.
My father has commented a few times on the redness of my neck. His latest comment was the lights from the television interview sunburned my neck...I let him know my neck has been that way since the stroke and there were no lights during the interview.
When I was in the hospital the swelling in my ankles had the staff put nylons on my legs. What a pretty sight! NOT!
I do notice that the swelling and red blood like freckles appear sometimes under the socks/short socks I wear with my jogging shoes. I think it has something to do with the medicines, time on my feet and even the socks since there is a definitive line where my short socks end.
My father has commented a few times on the redness of my neck. His latest comment was the lights from the television interview sunburned my neck...I let him know my neck has been that way since the stroke and there were no lights during the interview.
Yes Man
The movie "Yes Man" with Jim Carrey and the motivational speaker Tony Robbins convey a great message about saying "Yes" to opportunities. Although we need to use discretion and educated opinions when opportunities arise, we need to realize that we are all conditioned to stay in our comfort zone and say "no" to opportunities, like when a sales representative in a store asks if they can help us our initial response is usually "no".
In a past experience after playing a game of hockey the team went to the local bar for a beer. As we all sat around the table our friend Dave informed us he was renting a 4 seat airplane the next day and asked if any of us were interested in going. As he went around the table asking 12 of us, one by one including myself we all said "no". Later that night at home I questioned myself what better thing was I doing to reject the offer...I came up with nothing so I called Dave and asked if the offer was still open and he said yes. This experience was beautifully enriching, I went up with Dave a half a dozen times just after this and enjoyed each time more than the one before. My friend Dave unfortunately died at the age of 42 but I cherish these memories with him and I am so glad I said "Yes". Dave remains influential in my life, he was someone who said "Yes" to most ever opportunity that came his way and at his funeral many people could be heard saying they wished they could experience half as much as Dave did in his 42 years...they thought it would be a hard thing even with a full 80 years.
In a past experience after playing a game of hockey the team went to the local bar for a beer. As we all sat around the table our friend Dave informed us he was renting a 4 seat airplane the next day and asked if any of us were interested in going. As he went around the table asking 12 of us, one by one including myself we all said "no". Later that night at home I questioned myself what better thing was I doing to reject the offer...I came up with nothing so I called Dave and asked if the offer was still open and he said yes. This experience was beautifully enriching, I went up with Dave a half a dozen times just after this and enjoyed each time more than the one before. My friend Dave unfortunately died at the age of 42 but I cherish these memories with him and I am so glad I said "Yes". Dave remains influential in my life, he was someone who said "Yes" to most ever opportunity that came his way and at his funeral many people could be heard saying they wished they could experience half as much as Dave did in his 42 years...they thought it would be a hard thing even with a full 80 years.
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